The hymen is a piece of tissue that surrounds the vaginal opening. It’s usually a loose flap of skin (think of curtains around a window) that needs a little stretching or loosening before anything can be inserted into the vagina (including a tampon or a penis). The way this is accomplished is different from person to person. Sometimes the hymen can tear a little while riding a bike or running around as a child. Other times the hymen will tear only after it has been penetrated by a penis or a finger (this is where the old term “popping the cherry” comes from). And because everyone’s hymen is a little different, it’s impossible to look at a hymen and determine if that person has had sexual intercourse or if anything else has been inserted into the vagina.

There are some conditions when the hymen is a little…extra. Specifically, sometimes it can partially cover the vaginal opening with an extra strand of tissue (called “septate”) or completely cover the vaginal opening with or without little holes (called “cribriform” and “imperforate,” respectively). In these cases it may be difficult to fit in a tampon, finger or penis. You can look for yourself with a mirror and/or a doctor can make an official diagnosis. If you have one of these variants—don’t worry! It’s absolutely treatable, and your doctor can help you with next steps.